~Welcome to my personal story as a first time wife and stepmom. I use this space to share real life happenings in a blended family, funny stories, my personal frustrations, failures, and occasional victories as I journey through this life with two beautiful and challenging stepdaughters. Thanks for reading, and I hope you find something to help you have a better day!~
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
So Kate came home with a family tree project due for Spanish class (3rd grade). She had 1/2 poster board and instructions for a basic family tree, with herself at the bottom, and branching up and out, labeling all relative names in Spanish. I started digging for pictures of Jason's family and she started painting her tree. I explained we would need to use only half of her tree and she could complete her mom's side of the tree at her mom's house. That's when the confusion began.
Kate: "But what about you? You're my mom. Where do you go on my tree?"
Me: "Well there's only room for one mom on here, so let's just stick with blood relatives--let's only do people who are directly in your family line and we'll have to leave out people who married into your family."
Kate: "Well, I already have Grandma and Papa. Now where do I put Grandma Cindy and Uncle Jim and Aunt Kelli?" (my family)
Me: "Kate, yes, we are all part of your family, but none of us are blood related like I explained. I married into your family. So we aren't going to be on this particular project."
Kate: "Well can't I just do 2 family trees?"
Me: "Kate, look. You didn't actually come from two separate families. When you were born, there was one mom and one dad. That's how we need to make this tree. I love you like my own, but I didn't give birth to you. So let's just put your mom and her family on here, because that's what a family tree is. If sometime you have to do one again, maybe we can ask for a bigger poster so you can include your stepmom and stepdad, ok?"
I thought she finally understood and was appeased, and then the next day she asked where she was going to put her stepdad! Gotta love the complexity of blended families and learn to just roll with it!