~Welcome to my personal story as a first time wife and stepmom. I use this space to share real life happenings in a blended family, funny stories, my personal frustrations, failures, and occasional victories as I journey through this life with two beautiful and challenging stepdaughters. Thanks for reading, and I hope you find something to help you have a better day!~

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Stepdad vs. Stepmom

As I am out and about around other people, my ears always prick up when there is any talk of stepparents or blended family situations. These conversations, combined with movies, TV, and songs paint such a contrasting picture of how stepdads and stepmoms are perceived in this world. Here's my interpretations:


~How wonderful for this man to take on some dead-beat's kids and raise them as his own.

~Takes a great guy to be able to step in and love a woman AND her kid.

~Those kids really needed a guy like that in their lives.

~He's really doing the right thing by showing those kids what a father should be.


~Who does she think she is, taking over those kids? She's not their mom.

~That woman will never have a bond with those kids like their REAL mother does.

~She probably just married that guy for money and can't wait to get rid of the kids.

~She better check herself and not try to parent those kids. Her place is just to be friendly and no more.

Seriously, why is there such a difference in perceptions? "Stepdad" does not have the evil, wicked, dark cloud hanging over it's head like "Stepmom" does. Why are stepdads perceived as heroes while stepmoms are assumed gold-diggers with evil intentions? Is it all thanks to Cinderella and Snow White movies? Is it because kids pick up on mothers' jealousy and resentment towards the new woman, while men aren't quite as given to being emotional about the ex-wife's new partner? However it started, it is clearly an injustice. There are equal numbers of good and bad moms, dads, stepmoms, and stepdads. No one group is superior to the other, and it's up to us as individuals to prove that over time.